Choose LOVE not fear

eft tapping Aug 31, 2020
Title Image - Purple background with Blog Post Choose LOVE not fear - in white text.

You are what you speak.

Words have power.

We cast spells….’spell-ing’…

As many of us are facing a change again as we start September (2020) and many of our children start or return to school it can be very easy to get caught up in stories and news that will incite fear. Let’s face it many of us will have felt that for the past six months, me included.

What does Fear do in our bodies?

Fear activates our Fight Flight Freeze response. Often short term fear is useful, as it will help us defend ourselves (fight), run out of the way (flight), or pause (freeze). However, if felt for prolonged periods, will lower our immune system.

What actually is fear?
Fear is a negative emotion caused by an imagined, presumed or supposed threat to physical safety or your sense of self. Fear is often felt even though the experience hasn’t occurred yet. It impacts our thoughts, words, decisions and behaviours.

“Fear: False Evidence Appearing Real.”
— Unknown

We face stress all the time, and often adjust. This adjusted condition is sometimes referred to as allostasis (from the Greek root allo, meaning variable, and stasis, meaning stable). Therefore, we adjust to the variable conditions in which we live and the stressors we continually face. But under what seems like a constant barrage of new threats and hazards, we sometimes do not completely adjust. We live under what is called allostatic load (McEwen et al, 2002) —chronically elevated levels of stress (1).

So, we’ve seen here that fear can lead to prolonged stress and the fight flight freeze responds tries its best to continue - pumping the cortisol and the adrenaline. As the stress continues for some time “the body’s ability to resist is lost because its adaption energy supply is gone. This is often referred to as overload, burnout, adrenal fatigue, maladaptation, or dysfunction” - Hans Seyle, General Adaptation Syndrome.

And, the over production of cortisol and adrenaline can cause high blood pressure, sleeping problems, weight gain, acne, headaches and more.

Many of us may be reaching this phase - hands up who is exhausted?!

Fear impacts our words

How we feel impacts our thoughts, words, decisions and much more.

Words consist of vibration and sound. It is these vibrations that create the very reality that surrounds us. Words are the creator; the creator of our universe, our lives, our reality. Without words, a thought can never become a reality. (2)

The Law of Attraction follows the principle that what we focus on we create. The thoughts we have and the words we use emanate a vibration to the universe, and the universe goes about bringing experiences to you that match that vibration.

On the positive side, if we believe we are worthy of all of the joy, health, love and abundance the world has to offer, then the universe will be proactively working on bringing you these emotions and experiences. And on the negative side, well, you get the picture.

What can we do about it?

The good news is with Tapping / Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), we can actually shift and release our negative emotions such as fear, which in turn instantly stops the FFF - reducing cortisol and adrenaline. In fact, Tapping has been proven to reduce cortisol by 43% with just one hour of EFT.

“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”
— Marcus Aurelius

We naturally have so much more power than we are thought to believe or ever given credit for. Each of us stepping into our own power, understanding how we can create the lives we love to live, taking control and responsibility for ourselves and our actions, co-creating abundance with the universe…does not serve many in the system/world we’ve been brought up in.

If we understood our own power to heal ourselves - would that benefit others who sell products/services that help us ‘heal’? You get where I’m going with this.

Once we take our power back, and realise we can manage our own fear centres, we can do things to alleviate that fear and stress, we can take control of our immune system. We can create our own health. We can build a buffer within us to help us heal quicker if and when we ever do get sick.

As we release our fear, our thoughts and words and actions change. Our breath can be used to manage our fear too, because as soon as we start to take deep breaths you are sending a signal to the body that you are safe and it can relax and calm down. Our words can also be used to help release our fear too.


These two words are the most powerful words combined together in our language. What we say after ‘I am…’ will shape our lives. How do you mostly finish this phrase?

I am…tired, sick, fed up, lazy, fat, not good enough, unlucky, a bad person, unworthy, unloveable…


I am…powerful, strong, healthy, energised, good, lucky, successful, kind, loving, loveable…

Even if there is no truth in any of the words here, it is how you are defining yourself and that creates your reality. So even if you don’t feel healthy or strong, telling yourself on repeat or combining it with Tapping has an important affect in the subconscious. With the I AM statement you are ‘affirming’ a belief about yourself positive or negative.

Every thought we think is creating our future
— Louise Hay (Queen of Affirmations)

Did you know that the subconscious does what it’s told? and it has 95% or your brain power? So you use 5% of your conscious mind to program your subconscious mind that immediately does what its told and sets out to create your life based on what you tell it (from the 5%).

The key to unlocking your power and freeing yourself of your negative emotions is held in the subconscious. That’s why you have to use modalities and tricks that work in that part of the brain. Tapping, meditation, breathwork, yoga, positive affirmations, movement, essential oils, sound….all work in the subconscious.

Choose Love not Fear…

We all have a choice within every minute to think, feel, act from a place of love not fear - despite what’s going on in the world around us. We may not have a choice about a particular thing e.g. I have to stay at home during a lockdown…BUT we can choose how we think, act and feel about it.

So over the next few weeks it might be a good idea to start looking at the words you use, the emotions you are feeling and start to change them.

Alison Canavan reminded me of this from her book Minding Mum; ‘Stop, Catch, Change’.

It’s ok to feel the fear, to think the negative things. You’ve done this for your whole life. But if you want to, you can reprogram your natural default reaction. And that starts with noticing your response or words and changing them. The more you change them the easier it will be for them to stick.

As you walk this new path, you rewire and reprogram your brain into a more positive state of mind. Repeating positive statements are intentions and effectively prayers of what you wish to create.

You have so much power. You get to choose. What will it be…love or fear?



I have some resources that might help you get started with this:

Letting Go Tapping Meditation -

I AM Tapping Meditation (positive affirmations) -

Ho’oponopono Hawaiian healing meditation -





What Next?

I’ve a series of free Tapping Meditation videos you can watch on You Tube here

I run Tapping Workshops and Tapping Circles on different topics, as well as Corporate Workshops intended to teach tapping to as many people as possible. I will be launching a Pregnancy Tapping Club soon too. You can find out all about my different offerings here. If you want me to come (remotely) into your business to teach your colleagues how to tap email me here: [email protected]

If you want to take part in another replay for any of the tapping circles I’ve done before please find them in my shop here

I work one to one with clients releasing grief, trauma, negative memories, limiting beliefs and generally helping them to let go and feel much happier in themselves. You can book a session here.

Listen to my ‘Tapping into with Sarah Tobin’ Podcast - on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or via my website here.

Follow me on social media here: Instagram and Facebook and You Tube

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